Gun Control for Dolphins now!

“The killer-dolphins will be trained to attack enemy combat swimmers using special knives or pistols fixed to their heads, the source said,” according to RIA Novost

via Ukraine to use ‘killer-dolphins’ with pistols on heads to protect waters | ksl.com.

Imagine uncontrolled dolphins packing guns and robbing 7-11’s, liquor stores and bait shops. We cannot have that! Join the Coalition to Stop Dolphin Violence. Flipper must remain unarmed!

 

8 Replies to “Gun Control for Dolphins now!”

  1. DUH_DUH_DUMB… being at close proximity when a gun goes off underwater would most likely kill the expensive and cute dolphin…now, a Narwhal….that would be cool as training a unicorn to joust….and just as impossible.




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  2. “Poolside bar held up at gunpoint by unidentified dolphin…got away with $50 in kipper snax.”…Well, you know, they all look alike…grey, long nose, beady eyes.




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  3. See….now you’re just being petulantly hyperbolic. There’s no need for THEM to be restricted…they’re being ‘specially trained’, unlike those ‘other’ Cetaceans.

    (BTW…is it racist that they aren’t including Orcas in their training? They are BLACK after all…)




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