“Mimsy dear, you shan’t spray food coloring on Mr. Rapist’s eyes. It is offensive.”

Saw a screen capture of the Suffolk Constabulary in Reddit and could not believe my eyes. I went to the site and yep, it is there in all stupidity:

suffolk constabulary

How about Tasers? Nope, you can’t.

How about Home Invasion? Well, they tell you that “What you honestly and instinctively believe is lawful and necessary self defence of either yourself, your family or your property, even if you use a weapon could constitute reasonable force.” But since even throwing food coloring to the eyes of the guy with the pickax will be considered “offensive” you might as well bend over and take it. Do please remember to call 999.

Never an Empire collapsed so hard since somebody forgot to put a cover on a thermal exhaust port.

16 Replies to ““Mimsy dear, you shan’t spray food coloring on Mr. Rapist’s eyes. It is offensive.””

  1. I really do not understand the mindset that will take this kind of abuse. I will comply with the law as long as I fell I can use an effective enough tool to do so. When the law say I can use no effective tool then as far as I am concerned it is null and void, and I will carry what I see fit. If you disagree (and you find out, because I am not dumb enough to be obvious) then Molon Labe friend.

    Incidentally, If you are in Oregon I hope to see you on sat to protest the new stupid law. We aim to have some good old civil disobedience to go with the bluster 😉 (Ok, maybe I am dumb enough to be obvious)




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    1. I agree with you lucusloc. If they somehow obliterate the Second Amendment then my absolute and God-given right of self-defense supercedes any of their non-sense and I will carry whatever weapon I want, even if I have to go to the black market.

      They will turn me into their worst nightmare…the good citizen who has had enough and will show utter contempt for all their laws from then on. Oh, and I may then view the police with a hostile eye because if my life is going to be ruined for carrying a weapon to defend myself, then what is one more felony? Contempt of the law is a very dangerous position for a politician to cultivate.




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  2. I think this is going to change soon. The UKIP part took a surprising number of seats in the last election. The Rotherham rape scandal shocked the country, that the government knew what was happening and on the scale that it was and chose to ignore it in order to not rock the PC boat. You are seeing a rise of the right wing in Europe and a rebirth of Nazism accordingly. If the official policy of the British police is “just let the gang of Afghani immigrants rape you nearly to death, and try not to offend their religious sensibilities wile doing so” than the government isn’t going to hold back the people for very much longer.




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  3. A jolly good thrashing with a peacock feather aught to set that blighter right and send him afoot straight away.




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  4. Note that in the context of a discussion of the use of a product for self-defense, if the product or device is even intended to cause injury, it’s an offensive weapon. Clearly, in the UK there is no longer such a thing as “lawful self defense.” The point of self-defense is to discourage your attacker from continuing to attack you. If you can’t injure him to do so, then your options are extremely limited, both in scope and potential effectiveness.




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  5. Let’s not forget this merry little line:

    Any products bought from abroad have a greater chance of being illegal

    “From abroad”… i.e. free countries.




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