ZOMG! MASS MURDER MAGAZINES! (all caps required)

Via Snowflakes in hell we find the new Anti Gun Buzz Words: MASS MURDER MAGAZINES! brought to you courtesy of
.

As it happens, I do know of a Mass Murder Magazine. It is called Newsweek, issue of May 9, 2005.

This Evil Assault Magazine published a report by Michael Issikoff where he wrote about how those brutal interrogators at Guantanamo bay were flushing the poor innocent terrorists’ Korans down the latrine in order to shake them up. Hell was raised all over the Arab world and mobs took to the streets of Pakistan where between 15 and 30 people died. But, oppsie! the article published by Newsweek was, What’s the word I am looking for? Inaccurate? nope, not that one. Incomplete? nope, not that either…. Ah yes! TOTAL BULLSHIT! The Koran thing never happened and Newsweek and Issikoff issued a “retraction” which means they got away scott free from causing a mass killing. Other Mass murderers either have the decency of killing themselves or end up locked away for life.

Will the crap we have to deal with from these anti-gun idiots ever cease?

Why do we keep cheating women out of life?

I am all for empowering women. From the point of view of the pure male chauvinistic pig, I think strong women are sexy as hell (24 years with my lovely wife should be an indicator) and from the point of view of sheer laziness, I like the idea of not having to drag a woman alongside the supplies, weapons, ammo and hear her complain she forgot her make up case. I just hate whiny I-am-a-victim-pity-me women.

So, I am all for women to learn to defend themselves and to take any and all classes on any self defense thing out there; the more & better tools, the more independent she will be. So, Why in God’s good graces will anybody come up with certified bullshit like this?

Gardner says your cell phone is the best weapon because you can hit someone in a sensitive area such as their neck or throat. You can even take a photograph of that person who is being violent to you.

Debbie Gardner is the Survive Institute’s co-founder…or some crap like that. Allegedly she was a cop and I assume that she was issued some sort of communications device in lieu of sidearm as she patrolled the streets and used it successfully against bad guys in order for her to say that a cell phone is the best weapon.

This is irresponsible training. You cannot text to death anybody when your life is at stake. Maybe back at the beginning of the cell phone era when we had huge suckers like the old Motorola Brick, but you really think a petite woman with an IPhone is going to defeat a 250lbs attacker bent on evil? There is no app for that.

Yes, teach as much as you can on any and all the options. But do not dare to guarantee that the best weapon in your purse is a flimsy cell phone when you know damn well that keeping distance from an attacker is anybody’s best chance and a firearm provides the opportunity to do that with the added benefits serve as a not-so gentle reminder to the attacker that actions will have serious consequences and delivering such consequences if the attacker pays no heed to the obvious warning.

Spare me of the Politically Correct Bullshit Training.

The Missus and .357 - I am a good hubby or else.

PS: I am not even going deep to comment on the “take a photograph of that person who is being violent to you.” That sounds like “We would appreciate that you should have some sort of evidence with you when we find your corpse.”

I am stupid so you shouldn’t have rights… if you believe me.

In an article in the Hufftington Post, ‘I am‘ Sam Isaac Edwards goes into deep soul searching cum confession explaining that because we was stupid that during a night of libido bullshit showing off to a girlfriend, after chugging half a bottle of tequila and fingerfucking with a .45 caliber gun he ended up with a negligent (Yes I am Sam, mixing booze, guns with macho posture and ending up with a non-programmed shot is NEGLIGENCE) discharge that killed his refrigerator. Because of his self-confessed stupidity, I Am Sam begs legislators to think again before allowing less enlightened humans carry a concealed weapon wherever alcohol is served.

This Flagellant article reeks fabrication. After a half a bottle of Tequila, normal human beings are pretty much in between deep sleep or serious alcohol coma. Yet I Am Sam is still in good shape but barely tipsy enough to forget his finger placement…Ooopsie! And if you were really “in control” after the fore mentioned half a bottle of tequila, then your problem is not guns but serious alcoholism. Put the gun down and go to the nearest AA meeting.

And you know, if you would have stopped there, I might have shut up and just make a comment about how your lack of brains is not enough to suspend the rights of the rest of your fellow citizens. But you had to add:

I opened the door and something deep red ran out onto the tile in quick rivulets. Jeez, I thought, I musta hit an artery. I had. Ocean Spray Cranberry, the Aorta sized bottle.

A tad over the top with the overreaching visual. You went from souffle to scrambled eggs with extra two stirs and the piece of deep literary and psychological insight became just another cheap political ploy. And publishing it in the HuffPoo didn’t help either. So I am calling it Bravo Sierra and you go to Jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200. And for the next time, less is more.

Hat Tip and Muchas Gracias to Say Uncle