The Miami Herald serves us this bit of news from the Palm Beach Post:

A tired Target employee on her way home from working an early morning Black Friday shift lost control of her vehicle in Pahokee, drove into a canal and nearly drowned.

And after describing the horrifying scene, “reporter” Cynthia Roldan inform us that:

Target was among retailers that announced it was moving its Black Friday opening time to midnight. Others opting to follow suit included Macy’s, Kohl’s and Best Buy. Toys R Us bumped its opening to 9 p.m. on Thanksgiving, and Walmart joined the fray with a 10 p.m. opening.

That’s it! Those F@$#^ at Target made the poor woman work so hard and so long that she almost killed herself! We ought to do something about it! OCCUPY TARGET!!!!

But wait, if you read a bit too fast, you may have missed this little tidbit of information.

The woman was treated at Lakeside Medical Center in Belle Glade and released. She declined to speak with reporters.

Whut???She never spoke with reporters? Then how come Ms. Roldan knew if she was tired or was not or whatever?

What kind of people would write and publish an article purposedly designed to mislead readers?

Oh hell, I remember now: Newspaper People.

And the wonder why we do not trust them.