Lions and Tigers and Nazis… oh my!

Mitch Albom, a writer with the Detroit Free Press discovered that the etymology of the term “Assault Rifle” comes from Nazi Germany and maybe Hitler himself?

The assault rifle traces back to Nazi Germany. Did you know that? The Germans were trying to develop a more effective weapon for their soldiers, one that rivaled the firepower of a submachine gun but had better accuracy in more confined spaces.  Kill faster, closer in. That was the idea. Adolf Hitler, according to some accounts, even named the weapon: Sturmgewehr. It means “storm rifle.” Tuck that somewhere in the back of your mind. The first people to really utilize this weapon were Nazis. Not our forefathers. Not Thomas Jefferson. Not George Washington.

Holy shit, no.  Nazis!!!  Ban them all!!! Ban EVERYTHING!!!

Oh, wait.  Nope.  Never mind.

Yes, it is true that the term “Assault Rifle” comes from the StG 44, but as a gun nerd, I propose that the StG was not the first assault rifle.  If you go by the commonly understood definition: “By U.S. Army definition, a selective-fire rifle chambered for a cartridge of intermediate power. If applied to any semi-automatic firearm regardless of its cosmetic similarity to a true assault rifle, the term is incorrect.”  Than the first mass issued assault rife was the U.S. Army issue M1 Carbine.  It was select fire (early designs were select fire, this was ditched by the Ordinance Dept, but later put back in as an upgrade with the T4 and then as the M2), used a detachable magazine, and used an intermediate cartridge (the .30 Carbine is ballsitically more similar to the 7.92×33 than to the .45 ACP or 9mm).  Paratrooper models came with a pistol grip.  It is true it was not issued to front line troops and was considered more of a PDW, but it meets the definition quite well.  And that rifle was designed by David Marshall Williams, who was serving time in prison for murder when he developed the M1.

But I digress.

Guess what Hitler and Nazi Germany also paved the way for?  Anti smoking campaigns and bans on smoking in public.

Hitler was also big on preventing pregnant women from smoking or drinking.

Nazi Germany also paved the way on combating high fat and sugar contents in food.

The Nazis also created one of the first laws that required a permit to carry a handgun.

I guess NYC, San Francisco(most of California, really), and the rest of progressive America that bans smoking in public, trans fats, big sodas, and everything else tasty and fun for the good of public heath is run by Nazis and is carrying out the goals of the Third Reich.

I doubt any of that was also what our founders had in their heads when they created this country.  I don’t remember the government telling me what I can and can’t eat being in the Constitution.  Actually, I’m pretty sure the 10th Amendment says the opposite.

American is to go around with a Marlboro Red in one hand and a batter dipped, deep fried, Snickers in the other, alternating between the two, taking a break only to wet your whistle from the 2 liter Jack and Coke in the Camelbak you are wearing, all while permitless open carrying a pair of Colt 45s.

See, we can play this “the Nazis did it so it must be bad” game all day if you want.  By the time we’re done, I think I can effectively destroy every single DNC policy on this years platform.

4 Replies to “Lions and Tigers and Nazis… oh my!”

    1. Every single nazi used dihydrogen monoxide in their daily routine, so we must ban dihydrogen monoxide. For the chirruns.


  1. AAannnndddd THAT is why I have not read the Detroit Free Press, for (by now) decades. If I want liberal claptrap, I can listen to NPR, and yell at the radio in the privacy of my own car.



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