American Varna



It starts exactly like this:

Dear Red-State Trump Voter,

Let’s face it, guys: We’re done.

For more than 80 years now, we—the residents of what some people like to call Blue America, but which I prefer to think of as the United States of We Pay Our Own Damn Way—have shelled out far more in federal tax monies than we took in. We have funded massive infrastructure projects in your rural counties, subsidized your schools and your power plants and your nursing homes, sent you entire industries, and simultaneously absorbed the most destitute, unskilled, and oppressed portions of your populations, white and black alike.

All of which, it turns out, only left you more bitter, white, and alt-right than ever.

Can’t you just feel the contempt flowing off the screen?

In the Hindu tradition, there is a caste system called the Varna.  Up at the top are the Brahmin, the priestly class, and at the bottom are the Shudras, the labor class.  The Brahmin believe they were placed at the top by the God Brahma himself, and everybody else is stacked below.  In the Hindu tradition, the Brahmins are represented by the head, and the Shudras are represented by the feet.

When I read “Dear Red-State Trump Voter, Let’s face it, guys: We’re done,” I am inclined to agree.  

Mr. Baker explains that we are done because the Blue States are tired of carrying the dead weight of the idiot Red States.

Some folks here in self-supporting America like to believe that there must be a way to bring you back to your senses and to restore rational government, if not liberal ideals, sometime in the foreseeable future.

In the past, he has explained that the “Smug Liberal” is a myth.  They are not out of touch people who live in bubbles, it is that everyone else who is not a liberal is the problem.

There is something more pernicious going on here, part of the longer right-wing project to label anyone in the opposition as somehow deracinated, unnatural, unconnected to “the homeland.”

Why are we done?  Is it Red State vs. Blue State?  Is it Rural vs. Urban?


It is Head People vs. Feet People.  Self appointed Brahmin vs. those they identify as Shudras.

Despite his supposed working class background, Mr. Baker is a member of the Head People.  He is a low budget version of Michael Moore.

Like the Brahmin of the Varna, the Liberal Elite feel it is their duty to direct the culture.  They create the moral code for society that we Feet People must follow.  They are wiser and know better, because they went to a handful of the right colleges, were taught the right thoughts to have, work in the right careers, and are therefore blessed – the the American sense with fortune and sometimes fame.

The rest of us are Shudras.  We are feet people.  We didn’t go to the right schools and learn the right thoughts.  We don’t peddle influence or bullshit, or fondle money for a living.  We labor.  We grow the food, mine the coal, refine the petroleum, make the goods, pave the roads, and keep the lights on.  We are Feet People.

The Head People believe that they have every right to micromanage the lives of the Feet People.  Why not?  If we knew what was best, wouldn’t we be rich and famous like them?  Our middle class or working class incomes is proof positive that we need them to guide us and tell us how to live.

This is why the Left has come unglued and gone totally batshit since November.  We Feet People were supposed to vote for the Queen of the Head People.  We were supposed to want to be ruled over and managed and be told how to live our lives.

We rejected that.  We told the self-appointed gods to get fucked.

They just can’t understand why we voted against their iron-fisted, boot-to-the-face beneficence.  We must be bigoted, horrible, racist, misogynistic monsters not to know our own place in the world.

But if you actually came down and asked the Feet People what we want, 90% of the answer is quite simple.


As Douglas Adams said about god “and without faith I am nothing.”  The election of Trump showed the Head People that the Feet People have no faith in them as priests anymore.  This is exactly the same reason why the Oscars had such abysmal ratings.  The Feet People didn’t tune in to listen to the Head People’s sermon on a Liberal high holy day.

The Head People are screaming and yelling and trying to shame the Feet People into revering them again.  They are not coming to terms with the discovery that the gospel they preach is becoming more and more irrelevant to the Feet People.

So what is the other 10% of the answer?  Do what we think the job of government should be: take care of our people.

When the Feet People send our sons and daughters, husbands and wives, brothers and sisters off to war, when they come back and we see them waiting in line and dying at the VA but illegal immigrants getting a substantial portion of welfare and instate or free tuition it pisses us off.  When we see our bridges falling down and potholes in our highways and green energy companies owned by Head People get billions of dollars to go bankrupt, it pisses us off.  When we are told we are bigots because we have some concern about a  high school boy who wants to expose his twig and berries in a girls locker room, it pisses us off.  All of this reminds us that the Head People look down on us Feet People and don’t understand us, and don’t want to, and want to force their beliefs on us.

So what does Mr. Baker want to do about not being listened to by the Feet People anymore?

In short, we’ll take our arrogant, cosmopolitan, liberal-elite football—wait, make that soccer ball—and go home.

What an insufferable prick. What benefit is it to him?

For starters, we now endorse cutting the federal income tax to the bone—maybe even doing the full Wesley Snipes and abolishing it altogether. We will raise our state and local taxes accordingly to pay for anything we might need or want. We ask nothing more from you and your federal government. Nothing for infrastructure, or housing, or the care of the poor and sick—not that you gave us much, anyway. All we want is our money, and you can keep yours, dollar for dollar.

Expect reality is not on his side.  Take California.  It is hemorrhaging manufacturing jobs, Nestle and Toyota have pulled out.  The “land of startups” is the worst in the country for small business entrepreneurs.  California Head People welcome big, Liberal, dotcom Head People startups with their investment money.  If you are a middle class or blue collar worker, the Head People don’t want you there.  God forbid you toil in the dirt and grow anything other than Head People wine, they will destroy you for a fish.

Mr. Baker wants to live in Head People land, surrounded by only other Head People, who do Head People jobs.  Too bad for him, it is the Feet People that keep the lights on.

With all the extra money we’ll have, we can set up our own Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid systems once Paul Ryan manages to “privatize” them for you Trump Staters. And what city is all that privatized money likely to come to, on its way to the markets? Oh, right, New York, which you hate so much! All those extra Wall Street bonuses and dividends will really help the local economy.

Wall Street dividends paid for by the labor of Feet People.  This fucker doesn’t even understand that without Feet People making things, companies have no value.  He is so disconnected from reality that he seems to believe that companies just sort of make money.

Mr. Baker wants to push Head People land even further left, because they think that is the remedy.  It will destroy them.  I can do my job for the rest of my life without seeing another new movie.  It won’t affect me.  How will Hollywood Head People fare if Feet People just stop watching movies?

The Brahmin of the Varna live off the labor of the Shudras.  The priests do no labor.  The Head People need the Feet People to survive.  The Feet People will do perfectly fine without the sermons of the Head People.

Here is where America and Hinduism separate.  America was not founded on a caste system.  So much of what is happening in America today is a rejection of the de facto caste system that has been created.  The Feet People are tired of being seen as Feet People, to be subordinate to the whims of the elite.

The Feet People voted for Trump as an exercise against the elite.  The more push back against that  by the elite, the more they harden the resolve of the Feet People.

The only smart thing Mr. Baker said was:

We won’t formally secede, in the Civil War sense of the word. We’ll still be a part of the United States, at least on paper.

We own the guns.  We are the military, at least the non-flag officer ranks of it.  Keep beating us and tormenting us and shaming us and we will start to itch for the Civil War you want to avoid.

Remember this Mr. Baker, the Kings of France thought that they too were ordained to rule by god.  That didn’t work out so well for Louis the XVI.

6 Replies to “American Varna”

  1. Good idea, all you brilliant liberals can have the north east. ALL of us “feet people” will pack up and go down below DC, along with our skills of keeping this Country running. YOU with you high and mighty attitude can keep the power on,fuel flowing and coop foo foo food deliverys……..good luck with that


    1. Funk dat shiz…those of us up in Free New England are sick of the transplants coming north to “change things for the better”. Us Morlocks get on fine without the big city Eloi.


  2. If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen.


  3. J. Kb,

    You are wrong, they don’t consider us to be the Shudras. To them, we are the Dalits, the unclean, the untouchable class. We are to be ignored and despised.

    Except we will not be ignored.



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