Scaring the normals


I picked the boy up from daycare.  I walked in and one of the daycare ladies, a younger one, was saying something about experiments and STEM.

I asked if they were doing science in daycare.  She said “yes” and told me they did the baking soda and vinegar thing.

I laughed and said “that’s a start I guess.”  She mentioned how my boy liked it.

I said –

“Well, he takes after his dad.  I can’t wait until I start to get calls from angry science teachers about science fair experiments.  ‘(in falsetto) Mr. [J.Kb.] this is your son’s science teacher.  We need to talk about his science fair project.  He brought in a home made killbot and it went on a rampage.  No one is dead but there are 27 injured.’  (Back to my normal voice) So are you thinking a B+ then?  How many casualties did the other kid’s killbots get?   ‘(in falsetto) Children shouldn’t be making killbots for the science fair.’ (Back to me) Oh, that should have been in the handout from the school then.”

The daycare lady looked at me wide-eyed and asked “you would make weapons with your son?”

I replied “Why not?  I love my job.”

“You make weapons.”

“Along with, like, half the engineers in Huntsville.  Within 15 minutes of here is America’s oldest gun maker, an Apache attack helicopter repair depot, a US Army arsenal making ballistic missiles, a warhead test range, warhead guidance systems manufacturer, and a pretty much half the internal components for most of the military aircraft in our inventory.  So… yeah.”

I think I frightened her.


10 Replies to “Scaring the normals”

  1. You could have softened the blow by mentioning the FBI and DEA TEDAC where they do CT stuff. Oh wait, they still do experiments by having engineers and other scientists blowing up stuff. But at least it’s a LE function!

    1. It also might have given her pause for thought if you had told her that one reason for Redstone being there in Huntsville was geography – the ridges and hills surrounding the area act to contain any large (unintentional) explosions. Same goes for Los Alamos and Oak Ridge.

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