YOU GUYS ARE RUINING MY BEARD FETISH. Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve loved a man with a beard. To me, they meant strength, power, MANLINESS. Someone who could protect me. Unfortunately, you guys have turned it into a fashion statement. The beard has turned into the padded bra of masculinity. Sure itlooks sexy, but whatcha got under there? There’s a whole generation running around looking like lumberjacks, and most of you can’t change a fucking tire.
via This is f**king awesome: AN OPEN LETTER TO BEARDED HIPSTERS | Beardsy.com.
I could not stop laughing. I bet butts be hurt all over Hipsterland.
Heh.
When people ask about my beard, I point out that it is a lifestyle choice not a fashion statement.
I grow a beard because I hate to shave. I keep my beard and hair trimmed relatively short because its easy, and I don’t have to comb my hair before I go out.
I’ve let mine grow long and luxurious here in the land of the hipster and hippie, Portland OR. Mostly I do it because I can (there’s no dress code for a full-time Dad) but also because a) its a pretty awesome beard, b) my Daddy grew a beard, I didn’t learn it from anyone wearing skinny jeans, and c) its a chance to show these ridiculous hipster types what a beard should look like. These little bastards drive me nuts- they think its ironic to grow a beard and like esoteric stuff, but I’ve been doing that my whole life, and nothing ironic about it. Now they come along and make ME look like copycat, when they’re stealing my life!
…” Give them to your upcycling, DIY girlfriend and let her decoupage some photo frames, or something.”… perhaps paste them to her nether regions and stop trying to look like some prepubescent thirty year old.
I grow a beard because I’m too lazy to shave more than once or twice a week. As my dad said, “Only thing I hate more than shaving is those stupid little hairs.” They go up my nose and make me sneeze something awful.
My advice to Miss Daniels would be to look for guys who don’t wear beards. Then you can measure their masculinity by the size of their chin.
My chin has a massive cleft in it and is large enough to use as an impromptu blacksmith’s anvil. When people try to grab me around the neck, I jab them with my chin and the only reason they don’t let go is because I NOW HAVE YOUR HAND TRAPPED WITHIN THE IRON GRIP BETWEEN MY CHIN AND SHOULDER, SUCKER!
I should shave today…
While we’re at it, let’s toss “operator beards” into the poseur category…
Ahh, you can pick out the ‘hipster’ version a mile off, especially when paired with the round earrings that have a hole thru them. I must be getting old, those things just scream “target” to me, lol!
Just can’t see grown men wearing skinny jeans (all I can think of is Wolowitz in Big Bang Theory).
The only product that gets into my beard is RemOIl.
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