I told my wife about how I want my remains disposed off when I die. Cremation for sure, but I want inside the box with my body some 20 pounds of hickory chips and 5 gallons of molasses. I also want some sort of audio reproduction device that activates with a fast rise in temperature connected to a cellular telephone which will send out a pre-recorded message to a select few (or many.)

The idea is that when they shove the box in the crematorium, the audio device will activate, call those above mentioned selected few and hear me say “Damn it, it is getting hot in here! Somebody crack open a window or something!” And for the hickory and molasses, I want people that, as they leave, have a sudden urge for BBQ and head for the nearest pit. And no, there will be no after-funeral munching cold cuts in my name at my house. If I ain’t going to be there to enjoy it, neither will you.

Unless my wife decides something she would really like to do with my ashes (like using me to fertilize the lawn) I wouldn’t mind being sneaked half  into Stones River National Cemetery and half in Evergreen Cemetery, both in Murfreesboro, TN. They are both Civil War cemeteries and I would not mind listening to the old soldiers and their stories. I can’t think of a better way to spend the afterlife.

I am guessing that by now you are pretty much aware of the literal hissy fit that Liberals are throwing about the protesters against Obamacare. The now famous Obama as Joker poster has shocked some to tears and the well expected cries of racism are bouncing of the rafters. Liberal nutjobs are demanding the head of Glenn Beck for comparing Obama to Hitler (and Stalin and Mao) and even Maureen Dowd is demanding that the opposition’s freedom of speech should be crushed. You see, it is all Hate Speech not First Amendment if the criticism does not come from the selected ones in the Left.

You see, this picture is Hate:

But this one is Free Speech as expressed in the Constitution:

This is a gentle and polite political discourse:

But this is just is KKK fearmongering:

People can only deal with so much bullshit. I know my bucket is full already.

Attention Subjects: You are not to contradict what comes from the Government. Your elected representatives not only do not represent you anymore but actually order you to do their bidding forgetting that they work for you. Dissension must be curbed by ridicule (calling it AstroTurf as in fake grassroots) or to denounce it by emailing the White House and snitching on the dissenters. Just to be sure that these disruptors don’t take over Town Hall Meetings with their pesky questions, Union volunteers are now sucking up all available spaces in any room a Town Hall meeting is being held and removing (by force if necessary) those heathens who dare to oppose Obamacare.

Disclaimer: If you find this post offensive, racist and politically contrary against the Exalted One and his political bootlickers, please be free to contact SNITCH@WHITHEHOUSE.GOV … wait, I got it wrong, you must contact flag@whitehouse.gov and let them know that an enemy of the state is deeply conspiring against the Government by using that fishy First Amendment Right.

I feel I repeat myself and I usually don’t like it, but I will make any excuse necessary to plug this book. I always found the horror genre boring and stupid in the way authors treat their readers. It seems to be engraved in the stone that is the official guidelines to write horror that the human/normal characters are highly mobile screaming morons that will not see what’s coming even though there have been plenty warnings and even then, they seem to resort to a McGyverish solution as last resort but only because they are about the only ones left, the monster is about to kill them, all their buddies have already suffered horrible deaths and they are late for the opening of the Starbucks around the corner.

So I bumped into Larry Correia’s website by chance and read the sample of his book which back then he was publishing on demand (Internet version of selling from his garage) and I got hooked. All horror creations seem to start with some poor soul being killed by the evil monster but in this book the main character decided to kick ass and park the monster on a gas guzzler. The fight is painfully real as you can almost feel every laceration and broken bone as it happens. Hell I could almost smell the blood and rotting body parts as I sped, slowed down and re-read the descriptions. Cherry on top? The good guy actually gets his own crap kicked out and must spend serious recovery time. Not your typical monster hogwash so it bade well as your non-standard horror book. I ordered the book, got it and read it two times in a row in 48 hours and only stopped under direct threat from the wife who demanded her turn with the book.

According to my dear wife who is a true horror freak, the book has the best of the great horror classics and none of the political correctness or dumbness that plagues the genre nowadays. The monsters are really monsters and not tortured souls with some stupid redeeming value or not-so-veiled sex appeal to entice lonesome bored housewives. Basically you do not imagine the lead vampire as a Fabio look-alike dressed in ruffles but bleeding, stinking, blood dripping creatures that need to be put down ASAP. From a male point of view, it answers the question that any guy has asked before “Why the hell they got into that situation without the proper amount of firepower?”. Let’s face it, when you start a book shooting a snub-nose and close it with a five kiloton tactical nuke, you know it is a damn good book. However, iIf you are a metrosexual, you may be disappointed at the lack of hair mousse, facials treatments and the extreme level of violence.

Monster Hunter International is available at most of your local chain bookstores line Barnes & Noble, Books A Million, Borders and of course via Amazon.com.

If you want to know more about Larry himself, check his blog Monster Hunter Nation and he was dragged into Facebook screaming and shooting his Saiga by his fans but he finally seems to be warming up to the idea somewhat.

So, what are you doing here? Go get the darn book!

If you don’t know it yet, the Obama Universal Health Care proposal is so bad that neither the President nor any member of Congress will be covered by it. Instead they will maintain their privately run insurance with all the great benefits that carries with it. Since this seems to be a tad hypocritical, Congressman John Flemming from Louisiana proposed and amendment that would demand that everybody our members in Congress to have the same health care they are trying to impose on the common folk.

If you think that our elected members in congress should not have special privileges and deal with the health issue as we do, I urge you to go to Congressman Fleming’s website (http://fleming.house.gov/) and sign the petition that states:

Sign up here if you believe any member of Congress who votes for a government run health care plan should be forced to participate in the plan themselves?

I mean, if the Socialized Health Care is the solution, why aren’t they taking it?

Does anybody else feel like popping an aneurysm at the sight of Congress rendering a moment of silence of a crotch-grabbing pervert who probably died of overdose or excessive body modification? Let us remember that it is the same Congress that had no qualms in calling our servicemen and women Nazi-like and accuse them of perpetrating the most heinous crimes akin of Stalin and Pol-Pot.

Did we really elect those idiots?

A Pin Up of one of the sexiest Net cartoon characters is up for auction. Beautiful, enticing and armed Sam from Day by Day by Chris Muir poses for Honor the Troops event. Get Sam and help Honor the Troops.

UPDATE: The auction is over. $511 were collected and our heartfelt thanks to the winner!