Facepalm News

CSAM (Say What Now?)

They Blamed a Child

So, this Ohio dad found out his eleven year old daughter was being groomed by a dude on the internet, and manipulated into creating and sending sexual images of herself to the perp. He did what any of us would do (provided we didn’t have an address for the perp… lots of options when you know that… but I digress): he called the police.

Watch the video. I cannot EVEN. The cops say, and I quote, “I mean, she could probably get charged with child p*rn.”

I’m sorry, the ELEVEN YEAR OLD?

First, under the age of consent in a state (generally around 16, tho a bit higher and lower in various places), a child cannot consent. Therefore, they can’t be involved in sexual things by choice. Second, the unknown male perp should be getting charged with something, that’s for sure, and those cops should have been asking questions about him! Third, I don’t know that I’d have had the calm that father did, in just shutting the door and walking away. Good f’ing grief.

For those who may not know, CSAM means Child S*xual Abuse Material, and it’s a term used to differentiate between porn (which is legal and done between consenting adults) and child abuse (which cannot be consented to).

Facepalm News: Closed mouth gathers no foot.

I did not realize that Police Officers in Florida were subject to the same regulations as civilians regarding the purchase of guns, waiting periods and all. And the writer almost had me on his corner till he had to eagerly suction his colossal hoof.

A citizen with a Florida concealed weapon permit who has taken only basic firearm training and has not sworn an oath to protect the U.S. Constitution can purchase and take a firearm home the same day after passing a criminal background check. However, a formally trained police officer who qualifies for proficiency in firearms regularly as a professional is required to wait the Broward County mandatory five days.

Did you really have to piss on your fellow shooters and possible clients in order to make your case?

That was very stupid. I guess I’ll will not be visiting Dixie Guns and Ammo anytime soon or recommending fellow shooters to spend their bucks there.

Facepalm News: Getaway Vehicle Fail.

While committing a crime, it is wise to select a fast yet unobtrusive getaway vehicle. This thought appears to have never crossed the mind of a teen armed robber in Miami.

Miami police said a resident flagged officers down and said someone had been robbed by a teenage boy with a shotgun on a bicycle in the early-morning hours.

Officers stopped a teenager with a shotgun on a bike near 58th Street and Northwest 14th Avenue. After a confrontation, a Miami police officer and an Immigration and Customs Enforcement officer both opened fire, shooting the teen, according to police.

The economy must be really bad when not even cars are available be stolen and you are forced to use “green” transportation to do your dirty deeds.

Facepalm News: 911 & alcohol do not mix.

George McMurrain was out of booze and needed to go get some more. He made one call and he did get a ride… to jail.

Dispatcher: This is 911.
Suspect: I need a, I need a — a ride.
Dispatcher: You need a ride?
Suspect: Yes, to the liquor store.
Dispatcher: Um.
Suspect: Sheriff said she’d give me a ride.
Dispatcher: OK, you’re going to have to call somebody else, sir. You called 911. We can’t come give you a ride.
Suspect: Even the sheriff said she’d give me a ride.
Dispatcher: The sheriff said they’d give you a ride to the liquor store?
Suspect: That’s correct.
Dispatcher: Wrong.

George was arrested for misusing 911. No news if he will be facing charges for ethyl-stupidity.

Facepalm News: The victim was mean so I am suing.

A poor convicted felon is suing his intended victim for allegedly “roughed him up.” Michael Dupree is seeking damages for being stopped at gun point & handcuffed during a citizens arrest after Mr. Dupree broke into a van and stole a bicycle while under the effects of colombian pixie dust.

Pictured above is Mr. Dupree whose record is just quite exemplary.  Besides having his jolies with minors back in the day, he also served a stint for illegally carrying a firearm by a felon. If anything this is one more example that criminals (and the Brady Bunch) hate civilian ownership of firearms. Birds of a feather and stuff like that.

Facepalm News: Get training with a professional, please!.

Seriously, if you buy a frigging gun, have a professional instructor teach you how to operate the damn thing. A friend that thinks he knows how to handle a gun because he plays a lot of Modern Warfare might not be the best on to teach you.

The gun slipped out of his hand, and when he went to grab it, he grabbed it by the trigger, and it shot his finger and my son’s leg,” said Gonzalez.

I just hate seeing so much stupidity.