I am a wealth of bad advice

So I was going through one of the internet forums I regularly read looking for post ideas when I came across a thread about toilet paper tablets.

They are super compressed towellets made of a material that is somewhere between a shop towel and a thick gauze bandage.  They are about the size of a large asprin and will expand into the size of a paper towel sheet when you get them wet.

They have their uses.  I’ve known a few people who would take them camping or back packing because they are small and light.  Other suggestions include keeping some in your car for emergency use.

Preppers love them.

Here is a video of a prepper explaining his love for these things.

So…. onto the forum.

One person was still unsure of exactly why these things were so great.

Namely, his problem was that you need water to unravel them.  They don’t work dry and you can’t pull them apart without loosening them up first.

So in an emergency, you need a source of – presumably clean – water to get the process started.  If you are pulling over into the woods or whatever, you may not have have the water necessary to activate your toilet paper.

Enter my comment:

See, you are using them wrong.  You don’t get it wet and unravel it.  Swallow it like an asprin.  Give it a few minutes then pull it out so it cleans you like a boresnake.  It’s a lot more effective and you only need to use one.

I can’t help myself with snark like that.  I just hope nobody dies from it.


6 Replies to “I am a wealth of bad advice”

  1. You don’t really need *clean* water to moisten them.

    I do see how they could be valuable on trips to benighted lands lacking in toilet paper. Like Europe.

  2. “Swallow it like an asprin. Give it a few minutes then pull it out so it cleans you like a boresnake.”

    Ugh… i could’ve done without *that* mental picture. LOL!

    Brain bleach, anyone? 😀

  3. “Swallow it like an aspirin. Give it a few minutes then pull it out so it cleans you like a boresnake.”

    This statement is clearly “outside the box” thinking, but you didn’t consider the other possibilities…

    Instead of pulling it out, just let nature take it’s course and you have a “boresnake” that takes care of the other end.

    Instead of swallowing it, simply insert in the other end and you have instant self applied TP, no water needed!

    Sinus infection or just a really nasty head cold? Nothing this “boresnake” can’t handle, just insert and then launch!

    The possibilities are as endless as they are disgusting!

    MSG Grumpy

    1. “The possibilities are as endless as they are disgusting!”

      Now there’s a tagline for a new pharmacy product for bore-snaking the g.i. tract. LOL!

      [Billy Mays’voice] Forget laxatives or expensive body cleansing products! Just take 2 TP aspirins and you’ll be clean as whistle!! And if you call in the next 30 minutes, you get triple the amount for just $9.99!!! [/Billy Mays’voice]

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