A hotel model to be precise and no, not the one in the picture. But I keep a “couple” of guns in that thing plus magazines,  assorted handgun ammo and some papers.

Yesterday after a quick visit to the Wally World, I scored .22 LR ammo and some rifle cartridges. But when I went to secure them in the safe, I realized that inside was a mess that needed some clean up and order.

I can do this! I am an adult!

I pulled everything out, laid it on a table and went to build some order inside. It is ammo and guns we are talking about, I should not feel like I am playing tactical Jenga every time I open that safe.  Can I say I hate .22 LR manufacturers? People, it ain’t that hard to have ONE STANDARDIZED BOX SIZE for measly 100 rounds of ammo! Trying to get those boxes in order felt like those baby block games where you must insert the right shape in the right hole only there is no hole other than the one you are creating.

If the different 22 ammo boxes were not enough, then you have several different sizes of cartridges ranging from 9 mm to .30-06 that need to be fitted and, they are also different sizes.

Papers? They go in a manila envelope on the back of the safe. See? Genius! Magazines, speed loaders and the myriad of small unrelated parts you just kept shoving in there so they would not end up in the trash by accident? Zip lock bags by class. Again, genius!… but they don’t fit anywhere and I still have the handguns to deal with…. oh crap.

Long story short. I manage to place everything inside the safe in what it looks as if somebody with a sense of order lived in this house. You could not fit an anemic fart in there, but By God it looks good!  I swing the door in and nothing blocks it, bolts lock the door without effort. I smile in triumph.

….till I look at the table where a revolver and 2 boxes of ammo are just there sitting pretty. I swear I can almost hear them chuckling at my disbelief. I hate them, I hate them deeply and I tell them so by pointing outside and letting them know that contrary to many gun owners, I do have a frigging lake where guns and ammo could go and disappear. They are silent, but I can detect a bit of smirk. Nothing I can do.

I open the safe and look: there is simply no space. Strange since before I “fixed” it, the gun and the boxes of ammo were also inside. But now I might have created a temporal rift or some pocket dimension that made the safe shrink inside while maintaining the same outside dimensions. Now I am afraid to stick my hand inside for fear my digits end up doing a Stargate to some weird planet somewhere in the galaxy.

I have no other solution: Amazon search for gun safes.  I am not tempting the multidimensional gods for a couple of boxes of .357 Magnum.

And who said a full size K frame is a bad choice for New York Reload?