I recently went to a new doctor. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing ‘fairly well’ for my age. As I was a little concerned about that comment, I couldn’t resist asking him, ‘Do you think I’ll live to be 80?’
He asked, ‘Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer or wine?’
‘Oh no,’ I replied… ‘I’m not doing drugs, either!’
Then he asked, ‘Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?’
I said, ‘Not much… my former doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!’
‘Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?’
‘No, I don’t,’ I said.
He asked, ‘Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?’ ‘No,’ I said.
He looked at me and said,… ‘Then, why do you even give a shit?

Hat tip to Sean G.