The day you become an US Citizen, you are told and (it is no lie) that your certificate of naturalization is very important and that you must keep it in a secure location.

There are transactions and legal processes that demand proof you are a bonafide US citizen. For the US born, just presenting a Birth Certificate will more than likely be enough, but for us it is that that little piece of paper above which you were warned not to be bandied about and which will establish proof you are legal.
So the solution to show citizenship status without having to show the certificate is to get a passport as soon as possible and then bury the certificate in a wall next to the body of that nosy neighbor (Just kidding, I have a lake, remember?) or place it in a safe deposit box or, if you are smart, give it to the missus for safekeeping because your memory sucks specially after not touching the document for 2 decades and she still has every Valentines card you given her in 3 decades (plus) of marriage. The passport is accepted everywhere as proof of citizenship and is more portable too.
Now, one thing I stupidly did not do was to renew my passport before it expired and the renewal fees skyrocketed. So, I get the news I have to go to the driver license service center to renew the card because I am still outside the Real ID net and to bring proof of Citizenship, I have an expired blue book of happiness which is not valid for squat.
But from early age I was trained under the principle of having back ups, specially for documents (One is None and Two is One, right?) so I decided to look up online and see if I could get a certified copy of the certificate as back up. Hey, you never know what could happen from home to the DMV and back, right? Why take a chance and just have a back up.
And I can get a back up, provided I shell out $555. to the US Government.
That is $40 less that a brand new Glock 19 from Bud’s or 55 PMAGS on sale at Tombstone Tactical (I just got their email). Of course, imagine all the legal shit I can get into if I lose that paper and suddenly need it and no need to mention the amount of painful suffering I would get from a very pissed off wife.
I am going to be a paranoid wreck from the moment I go to the DMV and till I return and hide that thing again.
And yes, I made an appointment to get a new passport. I am gonna get me one of them little ID Card passports since I don’t plan leaving the US to anything overseas ever. And it is cheaper to boot.

Wish me luck.
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