In an article in the Hufftington Post, ‘I am‘ Sam Isaac Edwards goes into deep soul searching cum confession explaining that because we was stupid that during a night of libido bullshit showing off to a girlfriend, after chugging half a bottle of tequila and fingerfucking with a .45 caliber gun he ended up with a negligent (Yes I am Sam, mixing booze, guns with macho posture and ending up with a non-programmed shot is NEGLIGENCE) discharge that killed his refrigerator. Because of his self-confessed stupidity, I Am Sam begs legislators to think again before allowing less enlightened humans carry a concealed weapon wherever alcohol is served.

This Flagellant article reeks fabrication. After a half a bottle of Tequila, normal human beings are pretty much in between deep sleep or serious alcohol coma. Yet I Am Sam is still in good shape but barely tipsy enough to forget his finger placement…Ooopsie! And if you were really “in control” after the fore mentioned half a bottle of tequila, then your problem is not guns but serious alcoholism. Put the gun down and go to the nearest AA meeting.

And you know, if you would have stopped there, I might have shut up and just make a comment about how your lack of brains is not enough to suspend the rights of the rest of your fellow citizens. But you had to add:

I opened the door and something deep red ran out onto the tile in quick rivulets. Jeez, I thought, I musta hit an artery. I had. Ocean Spray Cranberry, the Aorta sized bottle.

A tad over the top with the overreaching visual. You went from souffle to scrambled eggs with extra two stirs and the piece of deep literary and psychological insight became just another cheap political ploy. And publishing it in the HuffPoo didn’t help either. So I am calling it Bravo Sierra and you go to Jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200. And for the next time, less is more.

Hat Tip and Muchas Gracias to Say Uncle