The Algorithm got me.

I was hit with the trailer for Jurrasic World: Dominion as the ad in another video I was watching.


This is the sort of utter horse-shit premise that can only come from soft-handed Hollywood writers who have never left the urban landscape of NYC and LA.

Our paleolithic ancestors wiped out most of the megafauna on this planet with sharpened sticks and stone tools.  Despite the presence of other horribly voracious carnivores, bears, wolves, tigers, lions, jackals, hyenas, etc., we have succeeded on every acre of landmass that we set foot on.  Again, armed with little more than stone tools and sharpened sticks.

The idea that a bunch of dinosaurs poses an existential threat to humanity is fucking stupid.

The reason the first Jurassic Park was so scary is that a handful of humans was trapped in the dinosaurs’ world.  The entire cast on the island was ten humans surrounded by hundreds of dinosaurs and only one SPAS12 between them.

Now flip the story.  A few hundred carnivorous dinosaurs let loose on a planet of 7 billion humans who have hunted our predators to near extinction and then put the rest into zoos or preserves so we can look at them from a position of safety.  It’s the dinosaurs who should be afraid.

If a T-Rex or a pack of velociraptors was really a threat to the local population, hunters would be paying fees to wipe them out like feral hogs in Texas.

Arguably, that would be encouraged – at least in Red states – as the biggest threat the dinosaurs would pose would not be to humans but to the local fauna, e.g., carnivorous dinosaurs wiping out the wild elk or bison population.  Smart states would be encouraging the hunting of dinosaurs as an invasive species, to protect the native species, the way Florida encourages python hunts.

As for one helicopter chasing a T-rex in rural America?  As soon as the first T-rex or velociraptor posed a threat to humans in Ruraltown, USA, every red-blooded gun owner would put in for a 577 T-rex, 600 Overkill, 50 BMG, 950 JDJ, or a 20MM to go T-rex killing.

The very premise of this movie is only plausible to the most cloistered of urban jungle city dwellers who do not understand hunters, Red states, or nature.

If I were going to do a Jurassic Park movie that falls on the heels of the terrible Jurrasic World: Fallen Kingdom, where dinosaurs are released into the wild of North America, here is what I would do.

Cattle ranchers in Colorado, Utah, or somewhere like that.  Their herd is getting massacred but it’s not wolves or the usual livestock predators.  It’s dinosaurs.  Now you have a small cast, maybe a dozen ranchers and cowboys.  They are in a remote location so help is not feasible.  They have an incentive, self-preservation and protection of the herd.  They can be outnumbered by dinosaurs.  They are armed, but perhaps not sufficiently for the largest of the carnivore species, e.g., a 30-30 may be enough for a velociraptor but not a T-rex.

This is not “lots of stupid and incompetent people get eaten.”  This is “a handful of people who are familiar with the land and how to survive are suddenly met with a species of predator that is far smarter and more destructive than what they are used to.”

This gives much more of the feeling of the first Jurrasic Park movie, with a bit of Jaws in the beginning, and perhaps some elements of The Grey and The Edge (both excellent man vs. predator in the wilderness survival movies) and is much more character-oriented.

Then again, I’m not a screenwriter who has never seen nature outside of the Central Park or the San Diego Safari Park.


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By J. Kb

8 thoughts on “The last Jurassic Park movie is some serious bullsh*t (mine would be better)”
  1. Libtardians refuse to face facts about the ingenuity, perseverance, tenacity, viciousness of the human race. I think/hope/pray, that they are going to learn about those things, soon.

  2. I don’t expect anything good to come out of hollywood now. In fact I don’t expect any western media to be any good anymore. These people are so detached from reality I have to wonder if they can even function outside of their bubble. I know that is kind of broad and their are still a fair amount of good shows and movies but those are in the small minority and I think some do well because they are moderately better than the crap produced nowadays. They do not care about making a good movie but making sure they check enough boxes and making sure they have enough cast members that are not white to appease the far left. It’s why most TV nowadays is also garbage. It’s also why when a movie doesn’t actually do that it tends to do well such as the more recent Spiderman movies.

    Part of me wants to watch it as I was barely even in grade school when I saw the original in theatres. And I thought Jurassic Park 3 wasn’t terrible.

    But then again one has to remember the desecration and destruction of well established franchises is what the left does. I mean how many franchises has the left ruined in just the last few years? Just off the top of my head, Star Wars, Star Trek, Dr. Who, Terminator, Ghostbusters, James Bond. And what they wanted to do to indiana Jones removing him from canon and making indiana jones a woman because reasons and the only one to exist however that got squished before the “npot so secret gay agenda” video calls came out. But when all you care about is checking diversity and inclusion checkboxes while attacking white people especially white males that make up the bulk of the fanbase, promoting ‘the message’ and not making a quality product because you literally do not care and then blame the fans when they revolt because they see your crap as crap what else would you expect?

  3. The weird thing to me, is that the “dinosaurs” in the Jurassic Park are acknowledged in the universe of the films (implied in the first film but explicitly stated in Jurassic World) as not actually being dinosaurs. They’re artificially created chimeric hybrids of dinosaur DNA and amphibian DNA used to fill in the missing gaps in the dinosaur genomes… and that In-Gen (I might be spelling that wrong) also built in the inability to manufacture certain enzymes necessary for the chimera-dinosaurs to live.

    It’s a major plot point that the chimera-dinosaurs adapt their diets to get the missing enzymes from food… But it’s sort of an obvious plot-hole that the corporation that made these chimera-dinos and has a complete gene sequence for every single one of them doesn’t also use their magical genetic chimera-ization super-science to just manufacture a strain of chicken pox or influenza that can kill the chimera-dinos with zero (or minimum) risk to humans.

    (Also, if your ultimate “everything is fucked” containment plan was “the animals are trapped on an island and will starve unless we give them certain specific foodstuffs” why in name of the ever lovin’ blue-eyed Thing would you create a mosasaurus!? And give it a tank that connects to the fuckin’ open ocean!?)

  4. Going from what I’ve read about big, dangerous animals: .30-06, .338, a number of cartridges common in many areas, using non-expanding solid bullets, could probably take down a Tyrannosaur. That bullet will penetrate until it hits something hard enough to actually stop it, or runs out of energy, and if your aim was good you hit the vital point, and- sooner or later, no matter how big it is- it dies.

    W.D.M. Bell shot a LOT of the elephants he took with a pair of .303 Enfield rifles using FMJ bullets and brain or heart shots.
    Of course, he was a good enough shot to do it; I once read an estimate of roughly 200 people dead because they tried to use the same cartridges but were not good enough shots.

  5. If I did not think I had enough gun? I would probably escalate to fire. It still works against military armored vehicles.

    Fire was always very effective in my fondly remembered 1950’s Huge Monster Movies. Yes James Whitmore killed a lot of giant ants with his Thompson SMG in “Them”, but when they needed to wipe out the entire colony, they used the flame-throwers. When his explosive rockets from his jet fighter squadron did not kill the giant “Tarantula,” Clint Eastwood switched to Napalm and roasted it in its tracks.

  6. I haven’t been unlucky enough to personally live in an area with a feral hog infestation, but considering what I’ve read of them, the first velociraptor pack to pull up in hog country is gonna get the same lesson as a rookie gang in Latin America that inadvertently cuts into the local capo’s profit margin.

Only one rule: Don't be a dick.

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