Last week, as I was digging through the filings in Rupp v. Bonta this song popped up in my music queue. I think I had heard it way back when, but certainly nothing more recent than a decade or two.

There is one thing I have learned about lawyers in my many years, my lawyers have all been good people, their lawyers have all been assholes.

My lawyer wayback when hired a new secretary. When I came into see my lawyer she recognized me. She use to work at a different lawyer’s firm. That firm had represented my wife during our divorce. I had a terrible hatred for that dude because of the way he helped my wife get one over on me.

Anyway this secretary, when she recognized me, told me that she remembered me from coming into her office. How she had appreciated how I had treated her and the rest of the staff. Then she shocked me by telling me that my ex-wife’s lawyer liked me better than he liked his client and thought I had done a good job of representing myself in the end.

Lawyers are like the pitbulls that J.Kb. talks about. They are vicious and nasty and evil, but when they are protecting you, that is exactly what you want. You just have to be careful they don’t get off their leash.

Lawyer Jokes in bad taste

Q: What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?
A: Not enough cement.

Q: What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
A: Skeet.

Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: Their lips are moving.

Q: Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?
A: New Jersey got to pick first.

Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!

The first thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers.Henry VII, William Shakespeare