I went to Wal-Mart on Sunday night for some critical toddler supplies. I was checking out when the cashier and I had a little encounter.
Wal-Mart Cashier: “Do you have glasses for the eclipse?” *Points to eclipse glasses*
Me: “I have everything I need. Glasses, stone basin, cold iron knife.”
Wal-Mart Cashier: “What?”
Me: (Completely deadpan) “You know. For the human sacrifice, to summon the Elder Gods and hasten the apocalypse.”
Wal-Mart Cashier: “Excuse me.”
Me: (A little louder) “All praise the Dark Ones.”
Wal-Mart Cashier: *Hands me receipt*
Me: “Thank you.”
Wal-Mart Cashier: (To my back) “He needs to find Jesus.”
Cold iron is going to come in handy in case you run afoul of any fey while camping.
Trolly olly oooh!!!
There is no Walmart, there is only ZUUL!
Thank you for my morning laugh-out-loud. The medical assistants at work started to look at me, as if I were peculiar….for some reason.
Laughed out loud so enthusiastically that I scared the cats. Good thing they can’t read; the furry little monsters would probably want to lead the ceremony.