Month: July 2019

Somebody show this girl to a pole

There are two things that I can guarantee I will see every Independence Day, fireworks, and every Left leaning news and opinion site publishing articles about why ackchyually America is a racist, bigoted, mysogonistic, shithole… yadda yadda yadda…

I caught a story from Jezebel:

A Modest Proposal: Let’s Rename Independence Day Literally Anything Else

I don’t need to read this to know she’s going to name is something Anti-American or totally banal.

(Skip to the end)

With that in mind, I’ve put together some quick suggestions on alternate holidays much more in line with America’s next generation, which still allow us to enjoy a long summer weekend:

Everyone Posts the Same Flag Cake on Instagram Day (Hazel Cills)
Unionize Your Workplace Day
MoviePass Memorial Day
Legalize Marijuana (And Release All “Drug Offenders”) Day
Crash Didn’t Deserve An Oscar Day
Old Town Road Day
Kamala Harris Is Still a Cop Day
Hot Dog Day (Megan Reynolds)
Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston Memorial Day (Julianne Escobedo Shepherd)
It’s Ok To Wear Those Flip-Flops Day
Reparations Are An Essential Political Agenda For Any Democratic Candidate Hoping To Be Elected Day
Yes You Can Eat Three Ice Creams Today Day (Alexis Sobel Fitts)
Abolish ICE Day
De-platform Gwyneth Paltrow Day
Charlie’s Angels 2: Full Throttle Is A Better Movie Than The Original Day
Rihanna’s Side Boob Day

I’m sorry you had to read through all that.

But if we go back to the beginning of the article everything makes sense, and I propose a solution that will keep us from having to deal with more of this shit in the future.

Note the two important parts I’ve bolded:

If you haven’t been paying attention, America is pretty fucked. And most of us have long been radicalized out of our previous understanding of the country we live in as an oasis of simple, wholesome pleasures. There’s not a single person I know that still refers to Columbus Day as anything other than Indigenous People’s Day. And Father’s Day? I think we can all agree it was the right decision to rename it, “Rewatch Lord Of The Rings for the Xth Time In An Attempt To Escape Generational Trauma Day.” But in an age when children are locked in cages at our border, trans women are murdered at excessively high rates, abortion rights are threatened nationwide, sexual predators hold many of our nation’s most powerful offices, Pete Buttigieg and the reanimated corpse of Joe Biden are dueling the astral projections of Marianne Williamson in the Democratic primary, and laborers have had our rights and wages stolen from us—is there anything left to celebrate?

I understand now.  She has daddy issues and got radicalized in college.

Fortunately there is a solution for this.

For decades, girls with daddy issues didn’t end up as writers for online shit-rags like Jezebel, they danced on poles for money.

We can’t fix daddy issues, but we can do a better job of sorting this girls away from radical Leftist professors and towards stripping.

I can’t promise that they will be any better off, but between seeing boobs for a dollar and having to read another screed by some gender studies graduate how much America sucks, I will take boobs any day.

Mad Magazine is closing down

At least in the old traditional dead tree version and maybe for good.

I am going to let you in in a little secret: It was with a Mad Magazine that I started my trip into the English Language and to be specific the issue of June 1973.

The cover got my attention and I bought it with my book fund. Dad would issue me a monthly small stipend for books and reading material and he was not happy when I brought this home since I was never into comics.

With the use of a small English/Spanish  paperback dictionary, it took me some days to go through the magazine an still did not understand a lot of it… no shit. I got a better dictionary with slang terms and then I started to get into the twisted humor of the magazine and was a fan for many years.

As it happens with many things, I eventually lost interest in the magazine, but that does not mean I am not sad to see it close.  And just before I wrote this post, I went online, found a decent copy of that issue and bought it.

What can I tell you? I am a bit sentimental.

And the greatest and most successful experiment in Human History thus began

We, therefore, the representatives of the United States of America, in general Congress assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the name and by authority of the good people of these colonies, solemnly publish and declare that these united colonies are, and of right ought to be, free and independent states; that they are absolved from all allegiance to the British crown, and that all political connection between them and the state of Great Britain is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that, as free and independent states, they have full power to levy war, conclude peace, contract alliances, establish commerce, and to do all other acts and things which independent states may of right do.

And for the support of this declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor.

 

 

Everybody needs a little dose of humility from time to time.

Pride goes before the fall and all that.  I decided to check a couple of the small sidearms I had not done any maintenance in a while and one was a regular carry piece.

Guns were taken apart, cleaned, lubricated, reassembled and checked for function. No problem, smooth as heck. Then I look at the spare magazine and figure, hey, why not a bit of oil? So I unload one round, two rounds and… Maraca! rounds rattling inside the mag. I tilt it and the ammo falls free with no pressure from the follower and the spring. Of course, I have to do the smart thing and bump the bottom of the mag against the workbench and sproing!

So now the follower is doing something it was not designed to do like protruding and being stuck on the magazine lips and I am not feeling like the smartest person out on South Florida.

Disassembly, fighting with the follower to get it dislodged without screwing the lips, polishing the not so nice shaving of plastic I managed to make on the follower. Then I looked inside the mag and there was some sort of congealed mixture of dirt and gun oil about less than quarter of the size of a grain of short rice stuck to a corner. I doused with cleaner and used a dental pick to remove it. Re oiled, cleaned and assembled everything back. Perfect function.

Seriously, it ws barely bigger than a speck and yet managed to stop the follower and be a major malfunction in waiting. I’ll be rechecking the rest of the magazines in the next few days for giggles and to avoid invitations from Mr. Murphy.

My NY Legal firearms so even the Gun Control haters in Twitter don’t get palpitations. Kahr CW9 and the Remington RM380.

When was the last time you check your mags?