Yesterday, around 30 experienced shooters (and some that were not) in the art of Zombie Nullification gathered at Markham Park in Broward County to exchange data and do some serious zombie killing. In between waves of zombies, we came to an agreement on several issues and I proudly share them with you.
1) Vanilla Ice died and became a zombie.
And to make things worse, the Vanilla Zombie was cloned several times. We killed all we saw but we cannot guarantee we eradicated the whole batch. Stay Alert!
2) Shotguns Suck as Zombie guns.
Heavy recoil, limited ammo capacity, poor range and generally people not practicing enough killing with it makes the shotgun a piss poor weapon to use against the evil horde. Nothing says fail like thinking you have double ought loaded but is 7 1/2 bird that comes out of the muzzle which only serves to give a zombie a bad rash. Plus there is the principle of the Curse of the Horde Amount which stats that the number of zombies you will face is equal to your shotgun capacity plus two. Leave the shotgun for water fowling or shooting at zombie geese.
3) Old Russian Rifles: Mosin Nagant beats SKS.
If you have this uncontrollable need to use some Soviet stuff, go for the Mosin Nagant over the SKS. The SKS’s limited capacity plus the fact you need to reload with clips makes it a loser. The Mosin’s muzzle blast is equivalent to a claymore mine plus the 6 foot long spike bayonet will skewer your zombies at a safe distance.
Or just get yourself an AK and play with the big boys.
4) SBRs with muzzle brakes are just annoyingly ostentatious.
And are a Zombie magnet. The muzzle blast could be seen and heard 3/4 of a mile away and the Mosin Nagant shooters complained it was too loud. But if you are standing close enough it will drain your sinuses and give you a tan. So, to SBR owners, one word: Suppressor!
5) The Zombie Apocalypse will make Sarah Brady cry.
I really do not need to explain why, Do I? 😉
Fool, Sarah Brady will be patient zero. Or in the early 100s.
Sorry, no, Joan Peterson will be Patient Zero.
Her critical thinking skills have already atrophied…the first sign.
Her lust for the blood of innocents is present (murder victims must be unarmed).
Her fear of firearms is irrationally pronounced, especially when carried by good guys.
You’ve scared me. And Halloween isn’t for another five hours or so.
And this is why I want an AR-15 lower with a Tactical Solutions SBX .22 caliber upper – a suppressed, zombie-killing package in the length of a normal rifle. Quiet, deadly (assuming good shot placement), light, and lots of ammo on-tap/on-the-vest. I can live with that :).
Also, that yellow font is damned impossible to read on the white Google Reader background ;).
I have to agree with that set up. Add a suppressed 22 handgun for close quarters & room clean up.
As for Google Reader go to Feed Settings… view in Google Reader play 😉
I jeeze – Vanilla Wiener – what a fraud-douche who said he was a motocross champion. Posted this over at Jon/Linoge’s but in context (and despite being an old post) it remains something to consider. The OWS crowd is the Zombie-host, the Balck-Bloc groups are the infection. If you watched the overhead video of the Occupy-Oakland riot and seen the Black-Bloc Sturmabteilung group get all zombie-wild and trash Whole Foods, you’d know a little pop-gun isn’t going to do it.
They looked like zombies, wore black like dead bugs, swarmed quickly like recently filmed zombies, attacked others who were too pacific – and given the numbers you need an AR at least, an AK probably mo’betta because they would recognize it. As far as I can tell be ready because they are getting ready, and they want it to happen. They need their own Horst Wessel-type to go down in the streets to make *it* happen – and they’ll do it to him themselves if need be to ensure they get the response they want. It’s all in the playbook. This is what they are working towards and it’s how Hugo Chavez took Venezuela. Standard Tactics.