-“Mr. Gonzalez, I am prescribing you Hydrocodone for the post-surgery pain. Take one pill every six hours.”
-“Good, I don’t like pain.”
-“Opioids will make you constipated. You may need a stool softener or laxative.”
-“Whut?!?”
I only took 3 pills, and I am now officially off opioid painkillers. Still, it took me 2 days to be back to the wife bitching about me not using enough Fabreeze in the bathroom.
Because relief comes spelled in more than one way. Plus being bloated after having abdominal surgery is not a very smart combination.
And no, I won’t post pictures.
That’s exactly how I was after both kidney surgery and having pins put in my hand. Two, maybe three doses for that immediate after surgery pain, then done. The constipation wasn’t worth killing the dull ache.
Glad ya seem to be in good spirits. Be sure not to strain yourself too much. Dont want to push yourself too hard. I was going to try and make a third joke about constipation but I’m not coming up with crap.
Really though, glad you’re feeling well enough to be back to snark. Wishing ya the best fella.
“And no, I won’t post pictures.”
Unambiguous proof that God loves us. And thanks for not breaking the Internet today, I need it for some stuff. 😉
After knee surgery 5 years ago and foot surgery last summer I learned that pain is another reminder that you are very much ALIVE. Three days in hospital last summer and I was done with opiates…the knee surgery I refused to take that crap. Too many problems arise from that. Glad you are better Sir.
“And no, I won’t post pictures.”
Many of us are ever so thankful.
Heal up, man.