I recently saw this article come across my news feed:

Jamie Oliver employs ‘cultural appropriation specialists’ so recipes avoid woke brigade backlash

Oh great, no more mixing flavors from different cultures anymore. That’s appropriation and needs to be policed.

Fan-fucking-tastic!

So I guess I shouldn’t tell Jamie Oliver that I Koshered a brisket, did a Korean barbecue rub, and smoked it Texas style.

That much appropriation will probably make him cry.

(It also turned out damn good)

But if having to have your recipes checked for cultural miscegenation by Woke segregationists was peak 2022, buddy, it’s only January.

From Insider (which should really be Insidehim for this article):

Hall said he started his online cooking show, “The Bottom’s Digest,” based on his own experience of trying to find foods that can make anal sex more enjoyable.

He said he would scan Reddit forums for anal sex tips and found alot of the advice was limited to statements like, “Don’t eat before you bottom,” and “Drink lots of water.” So he decided to create a platform to give fellow bottoms more options.

From Hall’s experience, anal sex preparation tips tend to focus on pleasing the person who is not the bottom, rather than making sure both people are comfortable during sex.

“I would go and look up food that’s good for bottoming. There’s just like nothing out there,” Hall said. Any recipes that do exist tend to be vegan or primarily plant-based, he said.

With the help of his husband and co-founder of “The Bottom’s Digest,” Mike Floeck, Hall created high-fiber, bottom-friendly recipes that can work for many diets.

He includes plenty of fibrous ingredients like oats, vegetables, and whole grains in order to reduce bloating, gas, and any possible “messes” during sex. If he includes an ingredient that is low in fiber, like meat, he increases the amount of fiber in the meal. The same rule applies if a recipe calls for a lot of legumes or gas-producing vegetables, like broccoli.

That’s about enough of that…

As our frequent reader Ish notes, there are some gay people whose entire identity if being gay.  Everything they do, every movie they watch, all their friends, gay.

Their sexuality is their personality.

Well I can’t think of anything more explicitly that than structuring your entire diet around getting fucked in the ass.

As least you won’t have to worry about cultural appropriation with the Sodomy diet since I’m pretty sure Mexican and Indian foods are out.

 

Like I said, it’s only January, I don’t want to know how much worse it will get from here.

How long until the FDA recommends eating bugs as part of an anal-sex friendly diet?

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By J. Kb

6 thoughts on “The celebrity chef that 2022 deserves”
  1. I can actually understand why some folks might see some value to what Alex Hall is doing and would buy his cookbooks or watch his videos. Every consenting adult should be able to enjoy their sex life and if making a change to your diet improves your sex life, good for you.

    Not to get too personal, but I found myself gaining a lot of weight in my thirties and the quality of my sex life dropped drastically. Cutting down on high fructose corn syrup and better managing my portion sizes let me drop the pounds… and my sex life (and life in general) improved greatly.

    Bottoming and anal sex aren’t necessarily everyone’s cup of tea. But as long as everyone involved is a consenting adult, I don’t really care how they choose to have fun.

    Jamie Oliver, on the other hand, isn’t offering people an option to choose how to live their lives. He’s purposefully meddling in other peoples’ business and justifying it as some sort of moral crusade.

    I have a feeling that if you told Hall “I don’t have anal sex.” his response would be “Oh. Well… Then you don’t really need my cookbook. But try the soup recipe on page 28 anyway. It’s super tasty.” But if you were to tell Oliver that you enjoyed making kosher brisket using Korean spices in a Texas barbecue, he’d rant for hours about how you’re a colonialists patriarchal shitlord.

    Now, if you’ll excuse me, I suddenly feeling the urge to find a nice hard salami.

  2. I’m not even a Brit. But whenever Jaime Oliver infects my tv/monitor, he’s indistinguishable from that Labor/Commie douche columnist for ‘The Guardian’, Owen Jones. I wonder why this is.

  3. Came for the ish comments, stayed to say it just sounds like better diet in general, more whole grains and fiber is good for everyone.

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